Photo reblogged from Discworld with 204 notes
193. 1. All fungi are edible.
2. Some fungi are not edible more than once.
Source: whatdiscworldtaughtme
Photo reblogged from Discworld with 74 notes
153. We who are about to die, don’t want to. (submitted by Le Anon)
Source: whatdiscworldtaughtme
Quote reblogged from Discworld with 20 notes
There is where the gods play games with the lives of men, on a board which is at one and the same time a simple playing area and the whole world.
And Fate always wins.
Fate always wins. Most of the gods throw dice but Fate plays chess, and you don’t find out until too late that he’s been using two queens all along.
Fate wins. At least, so it is claimed. Whatever happens, they say afterwards, it must have been Fate.*
*People are always a little confused about this, as they are in the case of miracles. When someone is saved from certain death by a strange concatenation of circumstances, they say that’s a miracle. But of course if someone is killed by a freak chain of events — the oil spilled just there, the safety fence broken just there —t hat must also be a miracle. Just because it’s not nice doesn’t mean it’s not miraculous.
Source: ragetti1
Quote reblogged from Fuck Yeah Terry Pratchett with 8 notes
Vimes awoke with a noseful of camel. There are far worse awakenings, but not as many as you might think.
Source: kindlequotes
Quote reblogged from Discworld with 63 notes
You had to admire the way perfectly innocent words were mugged, ravished, stripped of all true meaning and decency, and then sent to walk the gutter for Reacher Gilt, although “synergistically” had probably been a whore from the start.
Source: ekcetra
Quote reblogged from Discworld with 42 notes
People have believed for hundreds of years that newts in a well mean that the water’s fresh and drinkable, and in all that time never asked themselves whether the newts got out to go to the lavatory.
Source: reverse-mermaid
Quote reblogged from Discworld with 84 notes
‘A book has been taken. A book has been taken? You summoned the Watch because someone’s taken a book? You think that’s worse than murder?’
The Librarian gave him the kind of look other people would reserve for people who said things like ‘What’s so bad about genocide?’
Source: ashfair
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